» nigga hoe
posted on 05/30/08 by Opie
Lieutenant Horatio Caine spoofs. These are hilarious!
Funny as hell.
Child abuse PSA.. haha
Kobe jumping over snakes with the Jackass crew.
Very nice one punch KO.
Bet you try this.
Natural titties are the best. Flop, flop, flap!
(Think it's a repost, but it be funny)
One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear…
"You’re just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can’t you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn’t decide which one to take, so I told her we’d just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit."
We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out! a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you… she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn’t even know how to play tennis.
I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That’s fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let’s go to the cashier."
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don’t feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled,
I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You’re just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,
"Why can’t you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
Apparently I’m not having sex tonight either….but at least that bitch knows I’m smarter than her.
- FFL -
[NSFW] - Sex sites.
[NSFW] - Cute slut.
[NSFW] - Casual sex.
[NSFW] - HOT GIRLS.
[NSFW] - Perfect tits.
[ SFW ] - I just farted.
[ SFW ] - The glory hole.
[ SFW ] - Click and Pick.
[ SFW ] - Big ass snowball.
[ SFW ] - Crows are smart.
[ SFW ] - One hot, one not.
[ SFW ] - Makeover boobies.
[NSFW] - Dripping wet teen.
[NSFW] - Free porn be here.
[NSFW] - She has big titties.
[NSFW] - I found a fuck buddy.
[ SFW ] - She needs to be naked.
[NSFW] - The pool guy gets lucky.
[ SFW ] - Check out this knife/gun.
[NSFW] - Banged while watching porn.
[ SFW ] - Giant laser causes blackout.
[ SFW ] - College whores are the best.
[NSFW] - Beach party with drunk sluts!
[ SFW ] - Blind skater is better than you.
[ SFW ] - He does a great back flip.. kinda.
[ SFW ] - They sure are colorful for Indians.
[ SFW ] - Become a master of the INTERNET.
[ SFW ] - Mariah Carey throws the first pitch.
[ SFW ] - Why would you want Clay Aiken's sperm?
[NSFW] - Some DVD where people run around naked in the woods.
» myspace stalking 101
posted on 05/28/08 by Opie
Note: Will have some REALLY funny stuff Friday.
Topless girls in movies!
A Zebra dies and arrives at the Pearly Gates. As he enters, he asks St. Peter, “I have a question that’s haunted me all of my days on earth… Am I white with black stripes, or am I black with white stripes?”
St. Peter said, “That’s a question only God can answer.” So the zebra went off in search of God. When he found Him, the zebra asked, “God, please - I must know. Am I white with black stripes, or am I black with white stripes?”
God simply replied “You are what you are.”
The zebra returned to see St. Peter once more, who asked him, “Well, did God straighten out your query for you?” The zebra looked puzzled.
“No sir, God simply said ‘You are what you are.’” St. Peter smiled and said to the zebra, “Well then, there you are. You are white with black stripes.”
The zebra asked St. Peter, “How do you know that for certain?” “Because,” said St. Peter, “If you were black with white stripes, God would have said, “You is what you is.”
- FFL -
[NSFW] - Fuck'em.
[ SFW ] - GTA DUI.
[NSFW] - Local sex.
[NSFW] - Nice body.
[NSFW] - Whore sites.
[NSFW] - Sexy latina chick.
[ SFW ] - Match the boobs.
[ SFW ] - A sexy butt poser.
[ SFW ] - Bi-Curious George.
[NSFW] - Oh dear. I dare ya.
[NSFW] - She tries some porn.
[ SFW ] - LEGO of the Lost Ark.
[ SFW ] - GTA 4 stunt montage!
[ SFW ] - Giraffe fight = awesome.
[NSFW] - Boss fucks his secretary.
[ SFW ] - Ski accident compilation.
[ SFW ] - Must be cold in the there.
[NSFW] - Sperminator. Yes. it's porn.
[ SFW ] - Old school great stand-up.
[ SFW ] - Roping lessons via fat girls.
[ SFW ] - What happened to his face?
[ SFW ] - I Kissed A Girl. I like the video.
[ SFW ] - Family Guy Vs The Simpsons.
[ SFW ] - The quest for every beard type.
[NSFW] - Get naked girls on your desktop!
[NSFW] - Stop jacking off, Fuck a real girl.
[ SFW ] - This little league player is awesome.
[ SFW ] - Mostly drunk with a chance of horny.
[ SFW ] - One legged dude on American Gladiators.
[ SFW ] - Those goddamn ASIANS singing. (We are the World)
» yee hawwww
posted on 05/26/08 by Opie
Note: Videos are in flash now.
UFC 84 Wanderlei Silva Vs Keith Jardine (Great TKO)
UFC 84 Shane Carwin Vs Christian Wellisch (Awesome KO, watch the mouth piece)
UFC 84 BJ Penn Vs Sean Sherk (The ending)
This dude can dance!
Cell phones are evil.
Two buddies, Bob and Larry, are getting very drunk at a bar when suddenly Larry throws up all over himself.
"Oh, no... Now my wife will kill me!"
Bob says, "Don't worry, pal. Just tuck a twenty in your breast pocket and tell your wife that someone threw up on you and gave you twenty dollars for the dry cleaning bill."
So they stay for another couple of hours and get even drunker.
Eventually Larry stumbles home and his wife starts to give him a bad time. "You reek of alcohol and you've puked all over yourself! MyGod, you're disgusting!"
Speaking very carefully so as not t o slur his words, Larry says, "Nowainaminit, I can e'splain everythin. Itsh snot wha jewthink. I only had a cupla drrrinks. But thiss other guy got ssick on me...he had one too many and he juss koudin hold hizz liquor He said hes was verrry sorry an' gave me twennie bucks for the cleaning bill!"
His wife looks in the breast pocket and says, "But this is forty bucks.."
"Oh, yeah... I almos' fergot, he shhhit in my pants, too."
I hope he at least won.
Home made convertible.
Hi, I'm dumb.
Cut off part of her clit..
Scammer Vs Scammer.
Is she hurted?
I hope she got raped.
- FFL -
[NSFW] - Party?
[NSFW] - Whores.
[NSFW] - Hot blonde.
[ SFW ] - Jesus Saves!
[NSFW] - Local sexy girl.
[ SFW ] - SFW porn.. haha
[ SFW ] - World of Wifecraft.
[NSFW] - Get some local pussy.
[ SFW ] - Best music video ever.
[NSFW] - They doing the nasty.
[NSFW] - Sucking is her passion.
[NSFW] - Wet T-shirts are great.
[ SFW ] - Sexy rocker chicks rule.
[ SFW ] - Interview them naked!
[NSFW] - Nothing wrong with her.
[ SFW ] - That is a long ass jump.
[ SFW ] - Well this just turned gay.
[ SFW ] - Another fun story to read.
[ SFW ] - That is a shitload of ducks.
[ SFW ] - Wish those were my hands.
[ SFW ] - 10 Trippiest Cereal Ads ever.
[ SFW ] - No Country for Old Predators.
[ SFW ] - Aren't they suppose to be hot.
[NSFW] - Two girls are better than one.
[ SFW ] - Ball player traded for 10 bats.
[NSFW] - Hey, a white girl with a nice ass!
[ SFW ] - Funny remix of the crazy Soulja Girl vid.
[ SFW ] - Giant 'telescope' lets New Yorkers see London.
[ SFW ] - Weezer has INTERNET people in their new video.
[ SFW ] - It's funny because niggers get our nasty white womens.
» hump my leg
posted on 05/23/08 by Opie
Note: Will most likely be making the videos in flash starting Monday. :)
Possibly the biggest idiot on Price is Right.
Something is wrong with me.. I laughed.
Talking dog.. aww.. grrr.. fuck you!
Cool big foot jump.
Evolution of cell phones.
A man had been drinking for several hours in his neighborhood bar when the bartender started to close up. The drunken man got off his stool and fell to the floor. He pulled himself up on the stool, took one step toward the door and fell again. "Oh, hell. I'll crawl then," he said. He crawled to the door, pulled himself up by the doorknob, worked his way outside and fell again when he let go. He decided to crawl around the corner to his home. He pulled himself up to let himself in, managed to close the door, but fell again when he stepped toward the couch. After crawling to the couch he pulled himself up on it and went to sleep. An hour later his wife turned on the lights and woke him up.
"You've been drinking again, haven't you?" she said angrily.
"No, honey. I was out with the guys late and did not want to wake you..."
"Right," she said. "The bar just called to let me know you forgot your wheelchair."
Didn't know they made thongs that big.
Could be the most fucked up kid ever.
Can't forget anal!
They carry bows now?
Fergie has an excellent ass.
Her parents must be proud.
Welcome a new crack baby.
- FFL -
[NSFW] - Sexy.
[NSFW] - Fuck her.
[ SFW ] - The fuck?
[ SFW ] - Kiki is a hottie.
[NSFW] - XXX Personals.
[NSFW] - Ass and titties.
[ SFW ] - The Babysitter.
[ SFW ] - Fun little game.
[NSFW] - Hardcore action.
[ SFW ] - The fish slapper.
[NSFW] - One night stand?
[NSFW] - MILF with big tits.
[ SFW ] - Hawk Vs Rattlesnake.
[ SFW ] - Cameron Diaz is bald.
[ SFW ] - Some great mugshots.
[ SFW ] - Slow motion punches!
[NSFW] - Hottie with nice boobs.
[ SFW ] - I like it when girls dance.
[ SFW ] - How did I miss this remix?
[ SFW ] - Very high tech ambulance.
[ SFW ] - Optical illusions in real life.
[ SFW ] - This is the best woman ever.
[NSFW] - She wanted anal to celebrate.
[ SFW ] - Google Maps catches criminals!
[ SFW ] - Teach them young to be insane.
[ SFW ] - Love you like a fat kid loves cake.
[ SFW ] - Staring contest with Jessica Alba.
[ SFW ] - I'm bored. Make fun of Lordsoldiers.
[ SFW ] - This kid is really dumb, deserves jail.
[ SFW ] - Lost parrot tells veterinarian his address.
[ SFW ] - Indiana Jones Artifacts or Pier 1 Imports?
[ SFW ] - Gambia President is going to kill every homo.
[ SFW ] - I had to add her to friends in hopes of better ass pics.
[ SFW ] - This is one of the funniest things I've ever read. (Date from hell)
posted on 05/21/08 by Opie
Husband and wife
Husband - Aaah! ...At last! I can hardly wait!
Wife - Do you want me to leave?
Husband - No! Don't even think about it.
Wife - Do you love me?
Husband - Of course! Always have and always will!
Wife - Have you ever cheated on me?
Husband - No! Why are you even asking?
Wife - Will you kiss me?
Husband - Every chance I get!
Wife - Will you hit me?
Husband - Hell no! Are you crazy?!
Wife - Can I trust you?
Husband - Yes.
Wife - Darling!
AFTER MARRIAGE: read from bottom to top.
Send yours here!
- FFL -
[NSFW] - Escort.
[NSFW] - Teen tits.
[NSFW] - Nice rack.
[NSFW] - Naked girls.
[NSFW] - Great blow J.
[ SFW ] - Cheap shirts.
[NSFW] - Local sexy girl.
[ SFW ] - Define "baller".
[ SFW ] - Skeet Skeeter!
[ SFW ] - Whoose Boobs?
[NSFW] - Flash thy titties.
[NSFW] - Hot Brazilian ass.
[ SFW ] - I wish I had titties.
[ SFW ] - It's weird and sexy.
[ SFW ] - A dog that can fish.
[ SFW ] - When girls get wet.
[ SFW ] - All of them are hot.
[NSFW] - Fun in the classroom.
[ SFW ] - Holy sexy music video.
[ SFW ] - Beware of the Dildocopter!
[NSFW] - Check out some nasty girls.
[ SFW ] - Every Mortal Kombat Fatality.
[ SFW ] - Shitload of cash in a POS car.
[ SFW ] - Any House M.D. fan will love this.
[ SFW ] - Christian Bale signed for THREE TERMINATOR MOVIES!
posted on 05/19/08 by Opie
Today was MS paint day on the forums. (VERY funny stuff!)
Panda has a sneezing issue.
Think this is old, but I've never seen it.
Odd Barbie commercial.
Rocket to the ass.
I went to my doctor for an exam the other day.
The doctor said, "Mr. Smith, you're going to have to stop masturbating."
"Why?" I asked.
"Because I'm trying to examine you."
Check out my guns yo.
What a nice ref.
His legs are missing right?
- FFL -
[ SFW ] - I gots it!
[NSFW] - Hot bitch.
[NSFW] - Porn sites.
[NSFW] - Threesome.
[NSFW] - Fuck buddy.
[NSFW] - Big fake titties!
[ SFW ] - I Love Nymphos.
[NSFW] - One night stand.
[ SFW ] - That's just weird.
[ SFW ] - 6ft cow. Holy shit.
[NSFW] - Banged in the car.
[NSFW] - Casual sex for free.
[ SFW ] - YAY for cam whores.
[ SFW ] - Oh god. What a tool.
[NSFW] - She's got a mouthful.
[NSFW] - Yay for fake cock porn.
[ SFW ] - Ghost invaders. (Game)
[ SFW ] - Hit in the nuts for beer.
[ SFW ] - Cameron has nice lungs.
[ SFW ] - 10 toys that made you gay.
[ SFW ] - World's most wanted weiner.
[ SFW ] - Jim Jeffries is a funny fucker.
[ SFW ] - Who doesn't like Chuck Norris.
[ SFW ] - Superbad 2: The Order Of The Phoenix.
[NSFW] - She is too fine to be with that ugly dude.
[ SFW ] - Topic Thunder rated R trailer. (Funny shit)
[ SFW ] - Video of the Suge Knight KO. (After footage)
[ SFW ] - So Fox News is telling us how to make bombs..
[NSFW] - Foreign chicks stripping! You can only watch a few though.
» cha cha cha shit
posted on 05/16/08 by Opie
Brokeback Mountain and Demolition Man in 5 seconds.
When reporters get pissed. (Compilation)
Message from that guy from Super Bad.
Haha she got raped.
Yeah right, even I know it was racist.
There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.
Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."
"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."
"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."
Said it was a $500 bet.
How do you piss off Christians?
Gayest PS3 ad ever.
He's even acting white.
[NSFW] - Review.
[ SFW ] - Butt talk.
[NSFW] - Casual sex.
[NSFW] - Get laid now.
[NSFW] - 1 girl 2 dicks.
[NSFW] - Sexy galleries.
[NSFW] - Sign up bitches.
[NSFW] - Awesome blow j.
[ SFW ] - Celebs who died.
[NSFW] - One lucky fucker.
[NSFW] - It's a busty teen.
[ SFW ] - That's just weird.
[ SFW ] - Now that is an ass.
[NSFW] - Jessica has big tits.
[ SFW ] - Facebook in real life.
[ SFW ] - Miss Piggy has titties?
[ SFW ] - A shirt for a true geek.
[NSFW] - Oh no, not another one.
[ SFW ] - If you like Scrubs.. clicky!
[ SFW ] - Freaky, yet I don't get it.
[ SFW ] - Wow he's good. He's fast.
[ SFW ] - The Empire Strikes Barack.
[NSFW] - World record boobs!.. eww.
[ SFW ] - Where is this bar at? Hottie!
[ SFW ] - Little kids racing on mini bikes.
[ SFW ] - Horses can do somersault now.
[ SFW ] - Get a new T-shirt worth wearing.
[ SFW ] - Hey guys this girl was raped.. haha
[ SFW ] - I want to fly on jet-powered wings.
[ SFW ] - Mortal Kombat VS DC Comics game.. Gay.
[ SFW ] - Live action Beavis and Butthead movie coming?
[ SFW ] - Not sure what is going on, but the music is cool.
[ SFW ] - HA-HA someone knocked out that nigger Suge Knight.