06/11/17: All the archives are up-to-date!
CONTENT:
I bought Terri's feeding tube on eBay! posted on 03/30/05 by Opie



W.O.W: Big hanging titties x Sex = yay.

Quick Q and A!

Q: What does a retard say to his dog?
A: Down, Syndrome!



Chappelle's view on "drink". Good stuff.



Slap that ass!



God doesn't like Flanders.

JOOOOOOOKE

A local charity office realized that it had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer. The director called him, hoping to get a contribution.
"Our research shows that out of a yearly income of at least $500,000, you've given not a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give back to the community in some way?"

The lawyer replied, "First, did your research also show that my mother is dying after a long illness, and has medical bills that are several times her annual income?"

Embarrassed, the director mumbled, "Um…no."

"Or that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair?" The stricken director began to stammer out an apology but was interrupted. " Or that my sister's husband died in a car accident," the lawyer's voice rising in indignation, "leaving her penniless with three children?!"

The humiliated director said simply, "I had no idea…"

"So if I don't give any money to them, why the hell would I give any to you?"

IMAGES!



MAGIC!!!



I still need to do the T-shirt section..



DAMN NIGGA!






Stupid catfish. Ball = play.



I dare you to look.



Not as funny as the Jesus one.



True dat playa.



Yes, I know I'm going to hell. Save your e-mails.



What's going on here.



Roach fetish... THAT'S A NEW ONE.



Cat lovers?



Yay?

- FFL -

- Bad Hummer.
- Salma Hayek.
- Nice back flip.
- Destroy a website!
- XXX naughty chicks.
- Great fear factor clip.
- Presidents as... toys.
- Who wouldn't hit this?
- Saved by the bell quiz.
- Lil Jon crunk juice game!
- I bet that hurt the horse.
- Johnnie Cochran died! NO!
- Trya and Heidi show off new bras.
- Damn, even Sony is being sued.
- Skateboarders falling is always fun.
- A donation that hurt them.. haha
- Called the game because of BEES.
- DVD for your cats, that's it. I quit.
- Find people you went to school with.
- Surgeons Reattach Boy's Hands, Foot
- BMX badass, Corey Martinez. (Video)
- I was really hoping for a tittie or two.
- Blockbuster really had this one coming.
- Did you guys see this crazy knockout?
- If you're big on religion, don't click here.
- He needed to be going faster than that.
- Haha, click on: Episode Promo: 'Diversity Day'
- I need to go watch the Southpark movie now.
- This game should give your brain some action.
- Um, we want to see boobs. Not thong shaking.
- Anal Douche? Mine's filthy. (Read the reviews too)
- Like the stupid chicken dancer, but you have to win the cans.
- Wal-mart being sued for just 11mil.. They shit more than that.
- Breast Augmentation (Implants. BOOBIE PICTURES GUYS! HA-HA-HA?
- Too sleepy for sex? Be being a pro masturbater and all works out great.
- BMX riders being harassed at a skate park. (Cops are just doing their job)

Other post will be in the archives in a sec.



» Back! posted on 03/28/05 by Opie

Important note!:

Sorry I didn't get a chance to post on Friday, I had some personal stuff going on and almost took my own life with a pair of rusty scissors. Depression is no a laughing matter and if this feeding tube comes out I'll die, eventually. I also got a little silly and was going to go shoot up a local preschool in the ghetto, but I found God and changed my mind.

JUST KIDDING! HAHAHA... Um.. That wasn't funny.

Note: When there isn't a post there's plenty of other stuff to check out on this site. Maybe, learn how to look at other sections?

VIDEOS!



Here's the last of the Dane Cook on CCP.



Best half-time show ever.



I need to watch more Cricket.



Pimp my weapon!



Hoe don't cry when I nut in your eye, let it..



Boner time.

JOKE!!!!!!1111

A cop was patrolling at night in a well-known spot. He sees a couple in a car, with the interior light brightly glowing. The cop carefully approaches the car to get a closer look. Then he sees a young man behind the wheel, reading a computer magazine. He immediately notices a young woman in the rear seat, knitting. Puzzled by this surprising situation, the cop walks to the car and gently raps on the driver's window.

The young man lowers his window "Uh, yes, officer?"

"What are you doing?"

"Well, isn't it obvious? I'm reading a magazine, sir "

Pointing towards the young woman in the back seat the cop says: "And her, what is she doing?"

The young man shrugs: "Sir, I believe she's knitting a pullover sweater."

Now, the cop is totally confused. A young couple. Alone, in a car, at night in a lovers' lane. And nothing obscene is happening! "What's your age, young man?"

"I'm 25, sir."

"And her ... what's her age?"

The young man looks at his watch and replies:

"She'll be 18 in 11 minutes."

Easter Bunny brought images.



OOPS.



DAMN NIGGA!



Nice painting.



What a stupid ad.



Micheal Jackson clinic?



Guarantee laugh.



Wonder how that happened?



I'd like to operate this please.



That's just sad. Really.

- FFL -

- Ball Two.
- Hot Babe.
- Hot Videos.
- Fun with Tequila.
- What the... fuck.
- Terri Schiavo's blog.
- Great hockey fight.
- Correction: For idiots.
- Come onnnn fake tittie.
- Buy some funny T-shirts!
- Die so her sons can see?
- Wanna make a hovercraft?
- Michael Jackson audio files.
- I thought crack was candy.
- Time to get some big guns!
- Lots of amateur girl pictures.
- That is to crazy to be acne.
- If you want free porn, go here.
- We evolved from Octopuses.
- I feel dumber after watching this.
- Damn, how did I miss this movie?
- The guys laughing made it funnier.
- Kind of like off "The Pacifier" right?
- I just had to re-post this weird bitch.
- Who doesn't love a great whale tail?
- I always thought it was to piss me off.
- Comedy Central Presents: Brain Regan.
- A new meaning to chicken fingers huh?
- Remember that bad-ass flame thrower?
- Britney Spears is pregnant.. With my baby.
- Oh and here's a site with .50 caliber rifles.
- So.. This baby seal walked in this club and..
- Scientists find soft tissue in.. Sharp tooth.
- Took me 87 moves on this chess game. I suck.
- This is why David Blaine rules. (Clip from Last call)
- If you didn't see this on South Park.. Check it out.
- This is a really neat idea do with with your desktop.
- This flash movie was made by the MN school shooter.
- Uncensored version of the new Bugs Bunny flash thingy.
- Isn't it funny how the guy taking the pictures did nothing?
- "Poorly-drawn cartoons inspired by actual spam subject lines!"
- Something for the ladies when they have to tinkle. Yep I typed tinkle.
- Cock Jacked! By Spring Thomas. "Niggers don't make money" hahaha
- "Problem that makes me smell like corn beef and cabbage. I also have no thumbs"



» testing 1..2..3 posted on 03/23/05 by Opie

* No post Friday.. Will double up early Monday. *



W.O.W - Ex-Girlfriend / Girlfriend pictures. (As promised)



The 2nd part of Dane Cook! (This is funnier than Part 1)



First scene of Doogie Howser, M.D. GO BUY SEASON 1 ON DVD NOW!!!!



If you haven't seen Napoleon Dynamite.. Don't bother.

Pick-up Lines *Guaranteed "You fucking idiot" looks.*

1) First, point at the girl, and do the "come here" motion with your finger until she walks over to you. Then say "I knew if I fingered you long enough you would come." OR "Look, I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with two!"

2) Is there a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.

3) When do you get off, and how?

4) Is there a keg in your pants? Because I'd tap that.

5) Oh how I wish you were like my bowling ball. (she should look confused, and then say..) So you could be fingered three times, wind up in the gutter, but keep coming back for more.

Few images



Oh why...



damn.... NIGGA!



What's funnier.. The ASIANS or the big 'ol titties?



If I posted this before.. Well who gives a shit?

- FFL -

- Balls.
- 800lb hog!
- Hot Blonde.
- Hot foreplay.
- The OC lesbian kiss.
- Yeah.. Fuck save toby.
- Masturbate for PEEPS!
- Very nice drawing pad.
- Ice Age 2 teaser trailer.
- Awww they're hugging.
- Girls try stuff while drunk.
- Two hot girls and one idiot.
- She has more than a lazy eye.
- This peg game is pretty neat.
- Three girls stripping each down.
- Good game to keep your ass busy.
- Plane crash during a baseball game.
- Why everyone loves state troopers.
- Who would want a duct tape wallet?
- Remember the the guy playing Mario?
- No need to fear.. PISS MAN is here!
- Wins 27 million.. Can't be late for work.
- A bunch of those Christian Model videos.
- Changing seats while driving.. Not very smart.
- Big tumors in the titties. No need for a joke.
- Just my opinion.. But these bitches are crazy.
- Boy, does this dildo hurt. I typed out loud again.
- HEY BUTCH! DO YOU HAVE THIS HOT WHEELS CAR!??
- Well, APPARENTLY Satan has a bit of... turtle power.
- Long (but funny) story about a lady and her doggie.
- Oh look.. Another hot bitch giving some male punishment.
- Remember that "Defend your castle" game? Great game.
- Now I know what all you Starbucks freaks will be trying out..
- Wow. This video fucking rules. I did like 10 cartwheels after watching.
- The Electric Unicycle. Just imagine seeing someone riding down the street.



» Red Rover, Red Rover send... posted on 03/21/05 by Opie

Another 3-part clip special!!!! Yeah.. This time with the very funny Dane Cook. I have the audio in the "funnies" section, but here's the video:





Ever throw scissors at someone? Haha.



Info on how this fire started.

Q and A

Q: What would be the funniest thing to put in a black church.
A: The clapper.

Q: What's strong enough for a man but built for a woman?
A: The back of my hand.

Q: What's red and screams?
A: Skinned baby in salt.

Q: How many emo kids does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None, they just sit in the dark and cry.

Q: What do you call a black pilot?
A: Nigga with altitude.

Q: How do you blind a woman?
A: Put a windshield in front of her.

IMAGES



DAMN NIGGA!



Silly.



Fake, but funny.



Bulls: 1 - Pussy Bullfighters: 0



I AM UNDEFEATED IN THIS GAME!



Threesome! OOPS.. inside voice again.

JOKE!

It was a beautiful, warm spring morning. A man and his wife were spending the day at the zoo.

She was wearing a loose-fitting, pink dress -- sleeveless with straps.
He was wearing his usual jeans and T-shirt. As they walked through the ape exhibit, they passed in front of a large, silverback gorilla.
Noticing the wife, the gorilla went crazy. He jumped on the bars, and holding on with one hand (and 2 feet), he grunted and pounded his chest with his free hand.

He was obviously excited at the pretty lady in the pink dress.

The husband, noticing the excitement, thought this was funny. He suggested that his wife tease the poor fellow some more by puckering her lips and wiggling her bottom.

She played along and the gorilla got even more excited making noises that would wake the dead. Then the husband suggested that she let one of her straps fall to show a little more skin. She did, and the gorilla was about to tear the bars down.

"Now show your thighs and sort of fan your dress at him," he said. This drove the gorilla absolutely crazy, and he started doing flips.
Then the husband grabbed his wife, ripped open the door to the cage, flung her in with the gorilla and slammed the cage door shut.

Then said, "Now, tell him you have a headache."

- FFL -

- Hot Babe!
- Great hosting!
- Sex or success.
- Bush likes head.
- The bus is on FIRE!
- Head with Condom?
- Good keyboard player.
- Talking to Americans.
- Ass slapping fun. Yay.
- Say hi to Santa for me.
- Storm the House Game.
- Crazy cop chase wreck.
- Classic martial arts video.
- Hot young webcam teens.
- Gangster kids. West side.
- Catwoman: Copycat. Hmmm.
- More Pablo Francisco videos.
- Lil' Kim found guilty of perjury.
- This headline is very misleading.
- Arrested 5-year-olds now are we?
- A frog hospital closing.. Sad day.
- Yep, dog condoms. That's it, I quit.
- The love confession.. OVER THE INTERNET!
- One of the better scenes in The New Guy.
- Carmen Electra at the 2005 MTV AU Awards.
- Guys if your package stays cold, this may help.
- Video of the "kill box" in a shelter in NC. (Fucked up)
- Those titties aren't normal, they're cross-eyed things.
- Since this Peter Pan guy still keeps getting submitted...
- Your dog shit on your computer case huh? Feed it more solids.
- Everyone gets those e-mail scams right? They're really stupid.
- One of the sites Fred Durst is suing. Good luck with that CANADIAN Mr. Idiot.



» Uh oh posted on 03/18/05 by Opie

Edit: If you didn't notice already, the best of section is up. (In the features, on the right)



Soldiers shooting a dog for "fun". Don't be an idiot, I warned you.



This some type of fetish?



Pablo at the movies. (Very funny)



Little baby dancing to Beyonce.

IRC Logs

[Sefy] Dude, if the FBI ever came to my door
[Sefy] Im just gonna put in my other harddrive and boot in ME
[Sefy] Just so i look like a complete retard

piratebot4: oh man
piratebot4: my friend
piratebot4: this really nice black girl
piratebot4: her name is regina
piratebot4: well, in class they were writting their names backwards

[cancerpass] ever watched the monty python show/movies?
[over-thurr] yeah he's a very funny guy!
[cancerpass] i'll take that as a no

Jakefeb3: do you know a turtles only weakness?
AvatarOfSolusek: no
AvatarOfSolusek: well
AvatarOfSolusek: thier slowness
Jakefeb3: there weakness is they cant roll over when they are on their backs
AvatarOfSolusek: lol
Jakefeb3: now i have a plan
Jakefeb3: if i duck tape 2 turtles together they are unstoppable
piratebot4: and she realized
piratebot4: regina
piratebot4: a niger

[Sonium] someone speak python here?
[lucky] HHHHHSSSSSHSSS
[lucky] SSSSS
[Sonium] the programming language

[Fashykekes] Capitalization is the difference between "I had to help my uncle Jack off a horse.." and "I had to help my uncle jack off a horse.."

IMAGES.



What's wrong with this picture?



There's a bat coming at ya!



The infamous DAMN NIGGA continues..



He got his hair did.



OH.. I'm just hanging around.



Come onnnnn tittie.



Making fun of yourself gives you 10 points.

- FFL -

- Nasty Video.
- Hosting anyone?
- Ass fans? Clicky.
- Sexy Commercial.
- Sexy XXX galleries
- Look at the nipples.
- Ninja Turtles in Italy?
- Cat fights are the rule.
- This guy is like Rubber.
- Great motocross video.
- Crashes and Explosions!
- Hell yes I'm thirsty baby.
- Papercuts are the Devil.
- Three girls acting stupid.
- Guy full of horns and music.
- Two models making out.. Yay.
- Toys 'R' Us sold for 6.6 billion.
- Great ASIAN [The Ring] prank.
- Vampire Coach. On the next..
- This fool thinks he's a mermaid.
- Prison guard beaten by inmate.
- Watch out for this sex offender.
- Pamela Anderson taking a shower
- Nice picture of the car he's selling.
- Naughtyland aka Neverland Ranch.
- Beheading in London. Sorry no video.
- In case you didn't hear about Robert Blake..
- Take this test, only part of it worked for me.
- Read the last sentence. SURVEY SAYS!: Black guy.
- Haha.. Jamster blocked out that stupid frogs weiner.
- Useful French phrases. Pussies wasn't in there. (Kidding!)
- Why would a guy be carrying around a bunch of dildos? Nevermind..
- We all know what that cow is thinking. "HOLY SHIT DAMN NIGGAAAAAAA"

Sorry, I lied about the girlfriend pictures. (Going to try for next week) Mainly because I've been trying to get the Best of section up. As you can see there's a little progress and once I finish 2003, I'm going to upload what I have so far.

Took longer because I had to buy another server for that section alone. Thanks for be patient.. you little shitheads.



» $3.50 and some jawbreakas! posted on 03/16/05 by Opie



W.O.W = Nice.

Plug: Sign up, complete 1 free trial offer (Video Professor, eFax Plus, and Stamps.com are free and easy to do), refer some friends to do the same and you get a free flat screen.



Who isn't going to laugh at this?



Shooting friends while in the shower..

JOKE!

One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt. His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor.

"Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10." Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed:"You have tennis elbow.Soak your arm in warm water.Avoid heavy lifting.It will be better in two weeks."

Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled.He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message:

"Your tap water is too hard.Get a water softener.Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins.Your daughter is using cocaine.Put her in a rehabilitation clinic.Your wife is pregnant with twin girls.They aren't yours.Get a lawyer.And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better."

No images here



It's starting..



Who did that?



Damn Nigga!



Drunk and INTERNET don't mix.



It's like a little forest full of witches.



Pulled over by a horse cop... tsk tsk



My fetish.



What... No "drink holders"!?

- FFL -

- Go jack off.
- Mini-Putt III.
- Pretty Blonde
- Um.. Egg lovers?
- Napoleon VS Fender.
- Feel like getting laid?
- ASIAN tittie bounce.
- Beyonce at the Pool.
- Um.. That's just silly.
- Naughty college teens.
- What the hell is doing...
- This dude is thrown off.
- All your base Rhapsody.
- Sexy Video’s from Heavy
- More horseshit RING crap.
- Great horse racing game.
- Some whore on a webcam.
- More ghost videos.. BOO!
- Holy shit on stick! It's on sale!
- Arnold rules, shut the fuck up.
- List of celebrities doing ASIAN ads.
- I can't believe I just posted this SHIT!
- There's something cops don't train for....
- Funny rap battle. (Re-post, but worth it)
- 50 cent wants someone to shot at him.
- The cat hunter is getting death threats.
- Oral gonorrhea? You guys smell a fairy?
- How the hell would to hide/explain this dildo?
- Knievel's Wild ride: Great moto jumping game.
- My god.. How did Old spice get this hot ass girl?
- That's crazy that anyone could survive this crash.
- Another reason why I love Jennifer Love Hugetits.
- HAHAHA.. His nickname was OPIE! That dirty fucker.
- 15 naked ASIANS in one phonebooth. I wanta play.
- Needs some help with your Math homework? Cheater.
- Lots of music videos to watch. Navigate at the top.
- Check out the Iranian Police Women. Get in the kitchen.
- These sketches are great. Minus the penis and queerdom.
- The guy running the savetoby site is laughing at everyone.
- And I always thought fat people wanted to be like the Lifetime channel girls.
- FBI Concludes Investigation Of Notorious B.I.G.'s Murder. (Like they were looking)


 

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