posted on 01/30/08 by Opie
What kind of talk show is this?
(Submit more jokes)
A young blonde woman was driving through the Florida Everglades while on vacation.
She wanted to take home a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.
After becoming very frustrated with the attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the young Blonde declared, "Well then, maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator and get a pair of shoes for free!" The shopkeeper said with a sly smile, "Well little lady, why don't you go on and give it a try?"
The blonde headed off to the swamp, determined to catch an alligator.
Later in the day, as the shopkeeper is driving home, he spots the same young woman standing waist deep in the murky water, shotgun in hand. As he brings his car to a stop, he sees a huge 9-foot gator swimming rapidly toward her. With lightning reflexes, the Blonde takes aim, shoots the creature and hauls it up onto the slippery bank.
Nearby were 7 more dead gators, all lying belly up. The shopkeeper stood on the bank, watching in silent amazement. The blonde struggles mightily and manages to flip the gator onto its back. Rolling her eyes heavenward, she screams in frustration, "DAMN IT this one is barefoot too!!
Some excellent pussy pics.
- FFL -
[NSFW] - Hot girl.
[ SFW ] - Lesbians!
[ SFW ] - Great tits.
[ SFW ] - Hot babes.
[NSFW] - Oh-my-god!
[NSFW] - SIXTY NINE!
[ SFW ] - Sexy outfits.
[ SFW ] - She sure is bendy.
[ SFW ] - Stupid girls dancing.
[ SFW ] - Gizzy is the Shizzy!
[NSFW] - 2 sluts getting anal.
[NSFW] - Damn this girl is hot.
[ SFW ] - Great pair of panties.
[NSFW] - Teased and Pleased.
[ SFW ] - Porn star or Pop star?
[ SFW ] - Playoffs and Steroids.
[NSFW] - Bunch of goodies here.
[NSFW] - Chat with naked chicks.
[ SFW ] - Six in one gamble table.
[ SFW ] - Ana Beatriz Barros = hot.
[ SFW ] - Stripper Pole Punch-Out.
[NSFW] - Extreme kinky ASIAN stuff.
[ SFW ] - Montel Williams is da man!
[ SFW ] - Rosie has her own perfume.
[ SFW ] - Wish she would show those.
[NSFW] - Check out the hotel room clip.
[NSFW] - Blonde and brunette bombshells.
[ SFW ] - She may be dumb, but she's hot.
[ SFW ] - Angel Soft is short changing you!
[ SFW ] - Demetri Martin is funny like Hedberg.
posted on 01/28/08 by Opie
Q and A
Q: How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower?
A: Give the bitch a shovel.
Planet Earth: Fuck Edition.
Out of context.
This bitch gets owned big time. haha
Will Ferrel drops by and is funny as always.
Egg trick for you bitches to try.
I wish she would do porn.
Fun domain names.
1. A site called 'Who Represents' where you can find the name of the agent that represents a celebrity: www.whorepresents.com
2. Experts Exchange, a knowledge base where programmers can exchange advice and views: www.expertsexchange.com
3. Looking for a pen? Look no further than Pen Island: www.penisland.net
4. Need a therapist? Try Therapist Finder: www.therapistfinder.com
5. Then of course, there's the Italian Power Generator company: www.powergenitalia.com
6. And now, we have the Mole Station Native Nursery, based in New South Wales: www.molestationnursery.com
7. If you're looking for computer software: www.ipanywhere.com
8. Welcome to the First Cumming Methodist Church: www.cummingfirst.com
9. Then, of course, there's these brainless art designers: www.speedofart.com
10. Want to holiday in Lake Tahoe? www.gotahoe.com
Let there be light!
Elephant does a neat trick.
- FFL -
[ SFW ] - $10 tees!
[NSFW] - Flexible BJ.
[NSFW] - Ass fucked.
[ SFW ] - Cute models.
[ SFW ] - Hometown ho.
[NSFW] - Hot baby-sitter.
[NSFW] - Hot girls for you.
[ SFW ] - Sexy Kelly Brook.
[ SFW ] - These are funny.
[ SFW ] - I like the beach.
[ SFW ] - Dead cheerleaders.
[ SFW ] - This show is scary.
[ SFW ] - 2 birds 1 poor guy.
[ SFW ] - Double penetration.
[NSFW] - I need a latina maid.
[ SFW ] - Some hot girl fights!
[ SFW ] - Play games with her.
[NSFW] - She can ride it good.
[ SFW ] - Home alone orgasm.
[ SFW ] - Hot teen army booty.
[NSFW] - That is some squirting.
[ SFW ] - I found a fuck buddy.
[ SFW ] - The art of the pick up.
[NSFW] - Oh wow that was real.
[ SFW ] - McDonald's is ridiculous.
[NSFW] - Her boobs almost look real.
[ SFW ] - Pretty cool stickman game.
[ SFW ] - Escalator ride gone wrong.
[ SFW ] - Looks like he's taking a shit.
[NSFW] - Look at some of these racks.
[NSFW] - I don't get this type of porn.
[ SFW ] - Rick Astley on Pimp My Ride.
[ SFW ] - Ben Affleck is a gangster...of love.
[ SFW ] - These guys can't really be like this..
[ SFW ] - Cat & Dog massacre in China.. Yum!
[ SFW ] - Someone is going to kill Scientology.
[ SFW ] - Do's and Dont's with babies. (Funny pics)
[ SFW ] - Marijuana vending machines is a great idea.
[ SFW ] - Britney's body is starting to look good again.
posted on 01/25/08 by Opie
Make a wish foundation going bankrupt!
Clinton falling asleep during a MLK speech..
He got run over.. It's graphic!
Reporter Vs Birds.
Streaker gets owned.
Attacked via cheetah.
The secret behind the crank dat "song".
Two people were standing on the CN Tower in Toronto, Canada, having a beer.
The 1st Gentleman looks over to the 2nd Gentlemen and says "Boy this countries great, you can do just about anything its just amazing"
The 2nd Gentlemen replies with a "Meh"
1st Gentlemen replies "You don't believe me? Watch i bet you i can jump of the tower and the wind current will catch me and bring me right back to the top!"
2nd Gentlemen says to the Man "Don't be insane"
The 1st Gentlemen jumps from the platform and "Whoosh" The carries him right back up
The 2nd Gentlemen is shocked and surprised "I don't believe" he says
The 1st Gentlemen says "Still not believing me I'll do it again!" And just like before, "whoosh" and carried right back up to the top
The 2nd Gentlemen has just got to try this so he takes a running jump off the ledge and surely enough................... "Splat"
The bartender walks over to the 1st Gentlemen and says with hands on hips "Boy Superman your a mean fucking drunk"
Those shoes are ugly..
I'd like to take him bowling.
Great back hair.
- FFL -
[NSFW] - Fuck'em.
[ SFW ] - Who peed?
[NSFW] - Busty MILF.
[ SFW ] - Beach babe.
[ SFW ] - Sexy ladies.
[ SFW ] - Sexy swimsuits.
[ SFW ] - Hit the g-spot!
[ SFW ] - Cowgirl dancing.
[NSFW] - Nice real titties.
[ SFW ] - I'd bang Natalie.
[ SFW ] - Granny kegstand.
[NSFW] - Teased and pleased!
[NSFW] - I need to go to Miami.
[NSFW] - They like those dildos.
[ SFW ] - Motorboat those boobs.
[ SFW ] - 200k to travel in space?
[ SFW ] - Nintendo makes you fly.
[ SFW ] - American Psycho romance.
[ SFW ] - TGI Friday now IFH Monday.
[ SFW ] - They found a rock on Mars!
[NSFW] - Search for your fuck buddy.
[ SFW ] - Chuck Norris steps on necks.
[ SFW ] - Don't know how to explain...
[ SFW ] - Checks coming to Americans?
[ SFW ] - Jack Nicholson warned Ledger.
[ SFW ] - 33 weird statues and sculptures.
[NSFW] - Jessica has some big ass titties.
[ SFW ] - Pablo Francisco funny impressions.
[ SFW ] - Gym turns straight men into fags.
[ SFW ] - Rappers always getting arrested...
[ SFW ] - Heath Ledger talks about the Joker.
[NSFW] - Sex is the best medicine. (Or jacking off)
» lava lamp repair man
posted on 01/23/08 by Opie
Q and A
Q: What is the leading cause of pedophilia?
A: Sexy children.
Yeah, I know "That's fucked up haha"
Yes, that's a gerbil in her vagina.
Flash da police!
A man is browsing in a pet shop and sees a parrot sitting on a little perch. It doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says aloud, 'Golly, I wonder what happened to this parrot?'
The parrot says, 'I was born this way. I'm a defective parrot.'
'Holy crap,' the guy replies. 'You actually understood and answered me!'
'I got every word,' says the parrot 'I happen to be a highly intelligent, thoroughly educated bird ...'
'Oh yeah?' the man asks, 'Then answer this -- how do you hang onto your perch without any feet?'
'Well,' the parrot says, 'this is very embarrassing but since you asked, I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar like a little hook. You can't see it because of my feathers.'
'Wow,' says the guy. 'You really can understand and speak English can't you?'
'Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with reasonable competence on almost any topic: politics, religion, sports, physics, philosophy. I'm especially good at ornithology. You really ought to buy me. I'd be a great companion.'
The man looks at the $200.00 price tag. 'Sorry, but I just can't afford that.'
'Pssssssst,' says the parrot, 'I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody wants me 'cause I don't have any feet. You can probably get me for $20, just make the guy an offer!'
The man offers $20 and walks out with the parrot.
Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational. He has a great sense of humor, he's interesting, he's a great pal, he understands everything, he sympathizes, and he's insightful. The man is delighted.
One day the man comes home from work and the parrot goes, 'Psssssssssssst,' and motions him over with one wing. 'I don't know if I should tell you this or not, but it's about your wife and the postman.'
'What are you talking about?' asks the man.
'When the postman delivered the mail today, your wife greeted him at the door in a sheer black nightie.'
'WHAT???' the guy says incredulously. 'THEN what happened?'
'Well, then the postman came into the house and lifted up her nightie and began petting her all over,' reported the parrot.
'NO!' he exclaims. 'And she let him?'
'Yes. Then he continued taking off the nightie, got down on his knees and began to kiss her all over...'
Then the frantic man screams, 'THEN WHAT HAPPENED?'
'Damned if I know. I got an erection and fell off my perch!'
- FFL -
[NSFW] - Easy sex.
[ SFW ] - Blowjobs.
[ SFW ] - Hot babes.
[NSFW] - I like big tits.
[NSFW] - DVD quality porn.
[ SFW ] - Internet models.
[ SFW ] - Some cool tees.
[NSFW] - Swallow that load!
[ SFW ] - Amazing Anastasia.
[ SFW ] - Beach girls kissing.
[ SFW ] - The endless desert.
[NSFW] - A new KKK web site!
[ SFW ] - Teen pigtail orgasm.
[ SFW ] - Tagline movie trivia.
[NSFW] - Her first porn scene.
[ SFW ] - Celebs that look a like.
[ SFW ] - Blonde babe moment!
[NSFW] - So many titties in one.
[NSFW] - XXX Personals for Free.
[NSFW] - That's a lot of man juice.
[ SFW ] - Charlize Theron is sexy.
[ SFW ] - He's an excellent dancer.
[ SFW ] - These guys fucking rock!!!
[ SFW ] - This weather man is "huge".
[ SFW ] - Acoustic cover of Crank dat.
[NSFW] - Possibly the hottest girl ever.
[ SFW ] - Guy sings a song backwards.
[ SFW ] - A drunk baby is a happy baby.
[ SFW ] - GAME SLAP! Gaming out of control!
[ SFW ] - Heath Ledger died. Idiot pill head...
[ SFW ] - Only thing Pam can nurture is my cock.
[ SFW ] - Dramatic running scenes. (From movies)
[ SFW ] - Who the fuck steals woman's panties? This man.
» hey yo yo yo
posted on 01/21/08 by Opie
Cat Vs Dog. (I made it better)
She should stop dancing.
Must be an ASIAN monkey..
Twat punch hurts too.
Yay! I'm fat and can't run correctly...
He/she meant to do that.
I'd so let her do me.
Three guys, a Canadian, Osama Bin Ladin and Uncle Sam are out walking together one day. They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it. "I will give each of you each one wish, that's three wishes total," says the Genie.The Canadian says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Canada." With a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' the land in Canada was forever made fertile for farming.
Osama Bin Ladin was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around Afghanistan, so that no infidels, Jews or Americans can come into our precious state." Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' there was a huge wall around Afghanistan.
"Uncle Sam" (A former civil engineer), asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this all."The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 15,000 feet high, 500 feet thick and completely surrounds the country; nothing can get in or out---virtually impenetrable.""UncleSam" says, "Fill it with water."
- FFL -
[ SFW ] - Find X.
[ SFW ] - I'm in love.
[ SFW ] - Lone Rider.
[NSFW] - Fuck friend.
[NSFW] - Nude chicks.
[ SFW ] - Sex sells ads.
[ SFW ] - I am McLovin.
[NSFW] - Busty brunette.
[ SFW ] - Fashion shows.
[NSFW] - Lesbo sex party.
[ SFW ] - Holy execution.
[ SFW ] - Maze race game.
[ SFW ] - Hotter than HOT!
[ SFW ] - Sexy photo shoot.
[ SFW ] - Teen orgasm time.
[ SFW ] - I like skimpy outfits.
[ SFW ] - This nigga be crazy.
[ SFW ] - Sarah Blake's on fire.
[NSFW] - Sex in the parking lot.
[ SFW ] - Eva Longoria in chains.
[NSFW] - Fake amateur is hot too.
[ SFW ] - Urban Legends are true.
[ SFW ] - American Idol Punch Out.
[ SFW ] - Trapped in a hedge maze.
[NSFW] - You need a raincoat for her.
[ SFW ] - Like a skeleton with muscles.
[ SFW ] - He'll be sucking dick in no time.
[ SFW ] - This juggling game hurt my head.
[NSFW] - Hey! A bunch of girls sitting on things.
[ SFW ] - Crank Dat.. SAVED BY THE BELL version.
[ SFW ] - Raping a dog in 'Unspeakable Ways". Um..
[ SFW ] - Scientology orientation video.. They're idiots.
[ SFW ] - Paying for INTERNETS usage? Fuck that shit.
[ SFW ] - Keep up with that whore of a girlfriend you have.
[NSFW] - This would be better if it was a black guy holding a chicken leg.
» little bit
posted on 01/18/08 by Opie
If you haven't seen this, watch it! This guy rules.
How is she jump roping that fast?
This is bad ass machine.
Crazy how a heart attack can just happen.
OOPS.. Nice tittie though.
This virgin girl is on the phone and asks her boyfriend to come over and have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl announces to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and make love for the first time. Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some condoms. He tells the pharmacist it's his first time and the pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and sex.
At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.
That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parents house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in!"
The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head.
A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down.
10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy.
Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious."
The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist."
Seagull Vs Falcon!
Nigga stole his icecream.
Kind of retarded..
- FFL -
[ SFW ] - Hot MILF.
[NSFW] - Escort girl.
[ SFW ] - Latina heat!
[ SFW ] - Skimpy outfits.
[ SFW ] - Fluff the kitty.
[ SFW ] - I'd spank them.
[ SFW ] - K-Swiss is neat.
[ SFW ] - Big Is Booty-Ful!
[ SFW ] - Sexy photo shoot.
[NSFW] - Playing with dildos.
[ SFW ] - Father of the year!
[ SFW ] - Demon Ouija Board!
[ SFW ] - Scientologist boobs.
[NSFW] - Soaked via squirting.
[ SFW ] - Supertastic schoolgirl.
[ SFW ] - Hey a free shaving kit.
[NSFW] - Two guys, two chicks.
[ SFW ] - Sandra Bullock is sexy.
[NSFW] - FREE private sex party.
[ SFW ] - Girls and machine guns.
[ SFW ] - A dog gave birth to this?
[ SFW ] - Mouth-watering Michelle.
[NSFW] - Carmen swallows the load.
[NSFW] - This a masturbating party?
[ SFW ] - Webcam chick goes down.
[ SFW ] - Chuck Norris steps on necks.
[ SFW ] - What is wrong with this guy?
[ SFW ] - This is a fun game. Very fun. Yes.