10/13/17: Archives all updated! 10/12/17: New DAILY PICS ROLLING
CONTENT:
NeatO stuff ALERT! posted on Sunday 9/28/03 by Shane

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht frist and lsat ltteer is at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae we do not raed ervey lteter by it slef but the wrod as a wlohe.
Initsereg!!

A man walks into a clock shop and goes up to the lady at the counter and then puts his dick on the counter.

The lady is shocked and says, "Sir what are you doing!, This is a clock shop!"

Then guy then says, "Yeah I know I was hoping to get two hands and a face on it."


The mind of Steven Wright:

If you're not familiar with the work of Steven Wright, he's the famous scientist who once said:

"I woke up one morning and all of my stuff had been stolen...and replaced by exact duplicates."

His mind sees things differently than we do, to our amazement and amusement. Here are some more of his gems:

1- I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
2- Borrow money from pessimists - they don't expect it back.
3- Half the people you know are below average.
4- 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
5- 42.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
6- A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
7- A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
8- If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.
9- All those who believe in psycho-kinesis, raise my hand.
10- The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
11- I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
12- OK, so what's the speed of dark?
13- How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
14- If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
15- Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
16- When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
17- Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
18- Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now.
19- I intend to live forever -- so far, so good.
20- If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
21- Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
22- What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
23- My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
24- Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
25- If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
26- A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
27- Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
28- The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
29- To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
30- The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
31- The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
32- The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.
33- Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film!

Free Beer

A new guy in town walks into a bar and reads a sign that hangs over the bar...

"FREE BEER! FREE BEER FOR THE PERSON WHO CAN PASS THE TEST!"

So the guy asks the bartender what the test is.

Bartender replies "Well, first you have to drink that whole gallon of pepper tequila, the WHOLE thing at once and you can't make a face while doing it. Second, there's a 'gator out back with a sore tooth...you have to remove it with your bare hands. Third, there's a woman up-stairs who's never had an orgasm. You gotta make things right for her."

The guy says, "Well, as much as I would love free beer, I won't do it. You have to be nuts to drink a gallon of pepper tequila and then get crazier from there. Well, as time goes on and the man drinks a few, he asks, "Wherez zat teeqeelah?"

He grabs the gallon of tequilla with both hands, and downs it with a big slurp and tears streaming down his face. Next, he staggers out back and soon all the people inside hear the most frightening roaring and thumping, then silence. The man staggers back into the bar, his shirt ripped and big scratches all over his body.

"Now" he says "Where's that woman with the sore tooth?"

Top 10 Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Religion:

10. No one will kill you for not drinking Beer.
9. Beer doesn't tell you how to have sex.
8. Beer has never caused a major war.
7. They don't force Beer on minors who can't think for themselves.
6. When you have a Beer, you don't knock on people's doors trying to give it away.
5. Nobody's ever been burned at the stake, hanged, or tortured over his brand of Beer.
4. You don't have to wait 2000+ years for a second Beer.
3. There are laws saying Beer labels can't lie to you.
2. You can prove you have a Beer.
1. If you've devoted your life to Beer, there are groups to help you stop.

Due to increasing products liability litigation, beer manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all beer containers:

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an asshole.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your pants.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name you can't remember).
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter and more handsome than some really, really big guy named FRANZ.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy.

- FFL -

- Uhh.
- Word G.
- Cool site.
- Got butt?
- What a dork.
- Ink Blog test.
- Bad Bad pictures.
- Happy whacking.
- Bike fans are crazy!
- David Blaine game.
- For college peoples.
- Scratch that hit up.
- That's em on the right.
- Don't step on the mines.
- From Live Journal to dead.
- Where's your money going?
- Wow how can you drive this.
- Having trouble going to sleep?
- This band is gay, no seriously.
- Clip of David Blaine on Last Call.
- Live, Dead, now Insane Journals?
- How much are these in American?
- Haha.. Animal noises for little Ella.
- Who you gonna call.. The Love Police!
- Want some plastic on your body now?
- What's it feel like to be a fucking idiot?
- They all raped me, I forgot to file a report.
- What's the deal with cats and the Internet?
- The Napster site changed, has animation's now.

Site related

I'm going to be adding some more pages and thinking on a new layout which will have more features and such. Stay tuned crackas! (look at the updates for more info later)

26 comments
here it is posted on Tuesday 9/23/03 by Shane

Drugs are bad kids. (true story)

This guy was driving around after tripping LSD bad and he ran his car in a ditch and totaled it. When the cops got there he told them he just fell asleep, because he couldn't tell them what really happened which was a PINK ELEPHANT in the middle of the road. (which he had to swerve to miss)


Images:


- FFL -

- Hail Hitler.
- Oh SNAP!
- Kite game.
- Got pranks?
- Coincidence?
- Smelly site.
- G spot cracka.
- I smell porn.
- Trippin' dawg.
- Make it dance.
- Terminal Decay.
- Mutant animals.
- Simpsons and sex.
- The space people!
- Cool flash movie.
- For you CS freaks.
- The end is near??
- Annoy some cows.
- Insanely long test.
- Don't drop the soap.
- It's a legal pad site.
- For the "special" kids.
- Make your own movie.
- I thought I was a perv.
- I prefer the platinum grill.
- I thought I was a llama.
- Jesus lives... on the net.
- Lots of messed up signs.
- Yeah like this would work.
- Google has a counter now.
- What to get someone back?
- He's going to fight Spiderman.
- 011010000110010101111001
- Look at these fucking rabbits.
- Holy shit Hurricane Isabel air!!
- Still trying to figure this one out.
- What a gay bird. He gets owned.
- David Blaine may cast a spell on us.
- What to write a love letter? I don't.
- Hand-Eye Coordination test, cool stuff.
- I figured Tom Green would be riding this.
- Find what's different between two images.
- Hey everyone lets go throw some goats today!
- Boobies and Saran Wrap, what else do you need?

Oh yeah go check out Whit's site.

12 comments
this was in my email posted on Thursday 9/18/03 by Shane

The Best Break-Up Ever (Most entertaining night of SOMEONE'S life)

above edited because idiots can't read, it was in my email retards

The back story: Two days ago, my roommate and best friend (We'll call him Dan) and I got home and found the doors both locked and his television missing from his bedroom. His girlfriend (another paying roommate, and a passive aggressive bitch I can't stand) was gone, and her room was locked. We figured we'd wait for her to get home and ask her if she saw anyone with Dan's TV. She didn't show up.

Fast forward to today, 6 hours ago. Dan and I are hanging out with some friends and one of them asks if he knew his girlfriend was cheating on him.

"What the fuck do you mean?"
"She's cheating on you with Steve X. I saw them making out at Mark's party last night."
"Fuck you."
"I swear to God."

It went on like this for a few minutes, until he realized he was arguing with the wrong person about this. We left for home, in order to strategize and possibly find out what the hell was going on from our other roommate. When we got home, we found the door unlocked and the lights on upstairs.

The girlfriend had come home.

Dan stormed up the stairs, with me tailing close behind - to hell with minding my own business, I wouldn't miss this for all the rice in China. He barges into her room and asks "What the hell's going on" in an agitated voice. His girlfriend just gives him a blank stare and says she was at her friend's house for a few days - bullshit, said friend is out of town. He rails on for a few more minutes and then notices a slip of paper on her dresser.

It's a pawn slip. For a 27" Television. Holy shit.

Then he notices the name on the slip. Steven X. Holy shit. At that moment, he snapped. He immediately launched into a stream of profane screaming, the likes of which I doubt I'll hear again if I live to be a hundred years old. He somehow strung together obscenities in new, provocative ways that were a joy to behold, and he made up several new words in the process. It was almost musical.

Dan was *pissed*. And rightly so. After about 2 minutes of the happy couple screaming each other, he left the room in mid-'fuckingslut'. A few minutes later, I decided to go and see what he was doing, but right then he came charging back into the room with a warm 2-liter Mountain Dew bottle and resumed his tirade against his (now ex)girlfriend.

Again, Dan launched into a wonderful prose-like bout of obscenity which I won't even try to recapture here. His twisting, turning siren song of profanities made me proud to be an American, if only for a fleeting moment. I could have cried, were I not laughing so hard. Then came something totally unexpected, he stopped swearing. He stepped towards the alleged slut and looked for a second like he was wondering what to do.

Then he started pouring his Mountain Dew all over everything, laughing hysterically. His Girlfriend (her clothes, her hair - she was drenched), her bed, her XBox, her TV (which had been on this whole time and now made a loud popping sound as the picture faded to black for the last time) - all got a taste of yellow death. He then opened her dresser drawers and started pouring the liquid all over all of her clothes, to leave her nothing to change into. At this point I had stopped laughing and now held a look of pure awe on my face for Dan - now a hero in my eyes - who must have hardened steel balls the size of medium-sized watermelons.

His girlfriend was screaming bloody murder.
"What the hell are you laughing at?"

At this point, the shock had worn off and I resumed laughing as before. And then I noticed there was another, more pungent, odor underneath the fried electronics smell from the burned out television. Before I could identify it, Dan ran out of Mountain Dew and looked like he was going to going to keel over and go into cardiac arrest from laughing.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU LAUGHING AT??? ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE?" queried his lady friend demurely.
"AAAHAHAHAHAHHAHA YOU BITCH!!!! I FUCKING PEED IN THAT BOTTLE!!!"

His girlfriend dropped to her knees screaming in shock, clawing at her face and hair like she'd just been doused with acid. This was more than I could stand. I fell over onto my side with tears streaming down my face - laughing so hard that it felt like my liver had imploded. His girlfriend ran downstairs to try to call her friend to pick her up, not realizing that her friend was still out of town. When she finally managed to get a hold of another friend, that friend was too busy to come by with a change of clothes, so she had to go to the nearest store that sold clothing (a soccer apparel store 6 blocks away) in urine-soaked clothes and 30-degree windy weather to buy a change of pants and shirt.

When she got back, she decided to try for payback. She went upstairs and tried to open Dan's room - locked. She tried her key. No dice. He had changed the lock the day before because of having his TV stolen, and hadn't had time to give her a spare. Seeing that there wasn't anything she could do to get Dan back at the moment, she stormed out of the house about two hours ago, and we haven't seen or heard from her since.

This was perhaps the most entertaining afternoon of my life, ever. It's all downhill from here.

b0g and Ape Child make me wet.

56 comments
no subject? posted on Tuesday 9/16/03 by Shane

Lookie at the Media



Lookie at the Images


Beer vs Pussy

A beer is always wet.
A pussy needs encouragement.
Advantage: Beer.

Beers have commercials making fun of skunky ones.
Pussy does not.
advantage: Tie

If you get a hair in your teeth consuming pussy, you are not disgusted.
Advantage: Pussy

24 beers come in a box.
A pussy is a box you can come in.
Advantage: Pussy

Too much head makes you mad at the person giving you a beer.
Advantage: Pussy.

If a beer is brewed with yeast, it is still edible.
Advantage: Beer.

If you come home smelling like beer, your wife may get mad.
If you come home smelling like pussy, she will definitely get mad.
Advantage: Beer.

6 beers in a night and you better not drive.
6 pussies in a night and you have done all the driving you need.
Advantage: Pussy

Buy too much beer and you will get fat.
Buy too much pussy and you will get poor.
Advantage: Tie

It is socially acceptable to have a beer in the stands at a football game.
You are a legend if you have a pussy in the stands at a football game.
Advantage: Pussy

If a cop smells beer on your breath, you are going to get a breathalyzer.
If a cop smells pussy on your breath, you are going to get a high five.
Advantage: Pussy

Wearing a condom does not make a beer any less enjoyable.
Advantage: beer.

Pussy can make you see God. Beer can make you see the porcelain god.
Advantage: Pussy

If you think all day about the next pussy you will have, you are normal.
If you think all day about your next beer, you are an alcoholic.
Advantage: Pussy

Peeling labels off of beers is fun.
Peeling panties off of pussy is more fun.
Advantage: Pussy.

If you suddenly drop a beer, it may break.
If you suddenly drop a pussy, it may hunt you down like the dog you are.
Advantage: Beer.

If you change to another beer, your old brand will gladly have you back.
Advantage: Beer.

The government taxes beer.
Advantage: Pussy.

- FFL -

- Cough... porn.
- What the fuck.
- Hilter or Faker?
- A stupid IQ test.
- A retarded Lemur.
- Wet T-shirt game.
- I like this keyboard.
- Large and in charge.
- Christian pickup lines?
- Some Celebrity Doubles.
- Telemarketer prank calls.
- Someone pranks the RIAA.
- A blind boxer.. What's next?
- Hmm so Bush is made of ass.
- This site has a lot of cool shit.
- Like this will make a difference.
- Where's Steve Irwin.. By crocy.
- No way... Doo do doo do do doo do.
- Hey kids don't go to sleep while drunk.
- A site full of grown men crying, that's sweet.
- How many beers would it take.. a lot for some.

Use this link for the forums until I get the DNS fixed.

17 comments
I've been busy but.. posted on Thursday 9/11/03 by Shane

Get your FREE 9-11 DVD.

HOW TO TELL IF YOU ARE GAY (like you didn't know closet boy)

1. IF YOU ARE OVER 30 AND YOU HAVE A WASHBOARD STOMACH, YOU ARE GAY.
It means you haven't sucked back enough beer with the boys and rather you've been sucking-off the boys and have spent the rest of your free! time doing sit-ups, aerobics, and doing the Oprah diet.

2. IF YOU HAVE A CAT, YOU ARE A FLAAAAMING HOMO.
A cat is like a dog, but gay: it grooms itself constantly but never scratches itself, has a delicate touch except when it uses its nails, and whines to be fed.
And just think about how you call a dog..."Killer, come here! I said get your ass over here!". Now think about how you call a cat..."Bun-bun, come to daddy, snookums!" Jeeezus, you're fit to be framed, you're so gay.

3. IF YOU SUCK ON LOLLIPOPS, RING-POPS, BABY-PACIFIERS, OR ANY SUCH NONSENSE, REST ASSURED, YOU ARE A GAYLORD.
A straight man only sucks bar-b-q ribs, crab-claws, raw oysters, craw-fish guts, pickled pigs feet, or titties. Anything else and you are in training to suck El Dicko and undeniably a fag.

4. IF YOU REFUSE TO TAKE A DUMP IN A PUBLIC BATHROOM OR PISS IN A PARKING LOT, YOU'RE IN A DEEP HOMOSEXUAL RELATIONSHIP.
A man's world is his bathroom, he ! defecates and urinates where he pleases.

5. IF YOU DRINK DECAF COFFEE WITH SKIM MILK, YOU LIKE A HIGH HARD ONE IN THE POOP-CHUTE.
Coffee is to be had strong, black (or with thick, wholesome milk) and full-aroma. A 'tang-eating man will never be heard ordering a "Decaf Cafe Latte with Skim" and he will never, ever know what artificial sweetener tastes like. If you've had Nutrasweet in your mouth, you've had a dick there too.

6. IF YOU KNOW MORE THAN SIX NAMES OF COLORS OR FOUR DIFFERENT TYPES OF DESSERT, YOU MIGHT AS WELL BE HANDING OUT FREE PASSES TO YOUR ASS.
A real man doesn't have memory space in his brain to remember all of that crap as well as all the names of all the players in the Major league, NFL, NBA, college ball, PGA, and Nascar. If you can pick out chartreuse or you know what a "fresier" is you're gay. And if you can name ANY type of textile other than denim, you are faggadocious!

7. IF YOU DRIVE WITH BOTH HANDS ON TH! E WHEEL, FORGET IT...YOU'RE HUNGRY FOR MEAT-POPSICLE.
A man only puts both hands on the wheel to honk at a slow-ass driver or to cut the sumbitch off. The rest of the time he needs that hand to change the radio station, eat his hamburger, hold his beer, grab the bi-atch in the passenger seat (whoever she happens to be), or, if he's Latino, talk on his cell-phone.

8. IF YOU ENJOY ROMANTIC COMEDIES OR FRENCH FILMS, MON-FRERE, VOUS SONNEZ LE GAY, OUI?
The only time it is acceptable to watch one of those is with a woman who knows how to reward her man. Watching any of the above films by yourself or with another man is likely to result in SHC (spontaneous homosexual combustion), which is what happens to fags when they flame out too quickly.

Images for her pleasure


- FFL -

- A color test.
- I like thongs.
- A new folder?
- Cable vs DSL.
- Attn: Porn Cam.
- Pretty neat shit.
- Lots of sites die.
- Damn Englanders.
- New Babelize text.
- 160 pages of girls.
- Knugg Rally. yeap.
- Ugly couches.. Kinky.
- Hey a non-nude link.
- Teen Slang? Allrighty.
- I am glad I'm a richer.
- Baseball... flash style.
- Are you stressed out?
- Good at guessing ages?
- Apparently Rusty is gay.
- A fun way to kill yourself.
- Sit boo boo sit... good dog.
- Bad ass fighter pilot game.
- Think she's hot? It's a dude.
- The smallest shit humors me.
- Write fun stuff on the fridge.
- Change the url to whatever.
- I smell a photoshop edit. derrr
- Haha the next counter-strike.
- You fisherman should know this.
- Build an Xshok Controller. (xbox)
- A test for that queer eye show.
- A cell phone and a stun gun. yay.
- This is a stupid game, yet I post it.
- Watch pandas masturbate or something.
- Where's the OBGYN cam at. (Kidding ladies)
- The worst bow hunting game ever. (But fun)
- First to explain this to me gets a shiny nickel.
- If you didn't know by now google has a calculator.
- So this is what people look like after being hacked.
- Hey remember those flash boobie things? Here's a ton.
- FREAKKKKKKKKKKK, holy shit it's big foot... wait a second.
- Block the fucking RIAA (righteous idiots approving anal sex).
- Arnold gets hit by an egg. He should of terminated the thrower.

20 comments
I am the king of chapstick posted on Friday 9/5/03 by Shane



Kool-Aid skered me too.

If I hear that fucking BINGO song in the clubs again I'm going to:


Leroy is a 20 year-old 5th grader. This is Leroy's homework assignment. He must use each vocabulary word in a sentence.

1. Hotel - I gave my girlfriend crabs, and the ho tel everybody.

2. Dictate - My girfriend say my dictate good.

3. Catacomb - I saw Don King at da fight the other night. Man, somebody get that catacomb.

4. Foreclose - If I pay alimony today, I got no money foreclose.

5. Rectum - I had two Cadillac's, but my bitch rectum both.

6. Disappointment - My parole officer tol' me if I miss disappointment they gonna send me back to the joint.

7. Penis - I went to the doctors and he handed me a cup and said penis.

8. Israel - Tito try to sell me a Rolex. I say, "man, it look fake." He say, "Bullshit, that watch israel".

9. Undermine - There's a fine lookin' ho living in the apartment undermine.

10. Acoustic - When I was little, my uncle bought me acoustic and took me to the poolhall.

11. Iraq - When we got to the poolhall, I tol' my uncle iraq, you break.

12. Stain - My mother-in-law stopped by and I axed her, "Do you plan on stain for dinner?"

13. Fortify - I axed this ho on da street, "how much?" she say "fortify."

14. Income - I just got in bed wif da ho and income my wife.

- FFL -

- Holy shit.
- Cool jet game.
- His name is Ralph.
- His drawings suck!
- Game of Satan, yay.
- For all you mac guys.
- I still couldn't win, shit.
- Can it guess your gender?
- This is your captain speaking.
- Kids playing dead, how sweet.
- Oh neato a walking robot bird.
- Too many men play with Barbie.
- Learn how to do the cube game.
- You can have a rocket bike now.
- Uh this guy may need some help.
- I want to buy some beans that jump.
- This commerical makes my penis hurt.
- Dildos and the lord go great together.
- Learn about pussy, er I mean vaginas.
- What the shit? Yeah wash your ass with this.
- You're the shark, swim away from evil humans.
- The guy that made this doesn't like his brother.

18 comments
New month, new shit posted on Monday 9/1/03 by Shane



Turn your fucking volume up!

Do you shower like a Man or like a Woman?

How to shower like a woman:
1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see your husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror, make mental note-must do more sit-ups.
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with Cucumber and Sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it’s clean.
7. Condition your hair with Grapefruit Mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for fifteen minutes.
8. Wash your face with Crushed Apricot Facial Scrub for 10 minutes until red.
9. Wash rest of entire body with Ginger Nut and Jaffa cake body wash.
10. Rinse conditioner off hair, you must make sure that it has all rinsed out.
11. Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but decide to get it waxed instead.
12. Scream loudly when your husband flushes the toilet and you lose the water pressure.
13. Turn off shower.
14. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.
15. Get out of shower. Dry with a towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent second towel.
16. Check entire body for the remotest sign of a zit, then tweeze stray hairs.
17. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
18. If you see your husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas and then sashay to the bedroom to spend an hour and a half getting dressed.

How to shower like a man:
1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your wife along the way shake wiener at her making the “woo-woo” sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror and suck in your gut to see if you have pecs (no). Admire the size of your wiener in the mirror and scratch your ass.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Don’t bother to look for a washcloth (you don’t use one).
6. Wash your face.
7. Wash your armpits.
8. Blow your nose in your hands, then let the water just rinse it off.
9. Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower.
10. The majority of time is spent washing your privates and the surrounding area.
11. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs on the soap bar.
12. Shampoo your hair (do not use conditioner).
13. Make a shampoo Mohawk.
14. Peek out of shower curtain to look at yourself in the mirror again.
15. Pee (in the shower).
16. Rinse off and get out of the shower. Fail to notice water on the floor because you left the curtain hanging out of the tub the whole time.
17. Partially dry off.
18. Look at yourself in the mirror, flex muscles. Admire wiener size again.
19. Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on the floor.
20. Leave bathroom fan and light on.
21. Return to the bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass your wife, pull off the towel, shake wiener at her, and make the “woo-woo” sound again.
22. Throw wet towel on the bed. Take 2 minutes to get dressed.

Images


- FFL -

- GameCube.
- I'm hungry.
- I'll vote for her.
- Any news here?
- What a dumbass.
- Global Population.
- A new Mario game.
- Cast Away.. UNCUT!
- Justin banged Britney.
- Where's Mr. Miyagi at.
- Neat drawing of a girl.
- Stick figure adventures.
- Mine was off the chart.
- Hey I like monkeys too.
- Present for you stoners.
- Ouch, don't look at this.
- Where's that cheese at?
- I like the name of this site.
- Yay for homemade sex toys.
- An explanation of l33t speak.
- Remember those Peg games?
- She takes pictures of herself.
- More kids drawing very poorly.
- Whip a donkey's ass.. allrighty.
- Those nipples or valve stems?
- So this is what happens in elevators.
- I'm immortal, so I don't need one grr.
- It's Mini Kiss muhahaha ... muhahaha.
- Someone scanned a kama-sutra book.
- I still never got what the emo is all about.
- Ohhhh yeah Macho Man is rapping. (He's a retard)
- I don't think guys could do this. (ouch if you get a bite)
- Did we land on the moon? Watch the clip at the bottom.
- Draw porn! (answers: actor, a wall, challenger, blowing, an airplane)

Oh and join the fourms

23 comments

 

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